On Marriage

I celebrated 30 years of matrimony with my wife, Kelly, on August 25th, 2014. Kelly Marshall 30 Years

I recently saw a combined photo of a newlywed couple and the same couple taken on their 50th Anniversary and thought it was poignant, so Kelly and I decided to do the same for our 30th Anniversary.

The photos were taken at the Hotel Del Coronado in San Diego (on Coronado Island) where we spent our honeymoon in 1984. We didn’t stay at the “Hotel Del” as some shorten it for our 30th anniversary for budgetary reasons (a Bloody Mary runs $16.00 plus gratuity). It is a lovely, historic facility in a lovely part of the country and I’m glad we had the opportunity to stay there for our honeymoon (the movie, ‘Some Like It Hot’ was shot there).

Last night Kelly and I attended the wedding of a business associate and friend of mine I’ve known for some years (her previous husband passed away after an extended illness). She and her new husband were married in the church they both attend and are involved in ministry. It was a perfectly lovely ceremony.

On a humorous note, she’s black and her new husband is white, so the pastor referred to them as being “pepper and salt” to the congregation and after the pastor pronounced them man and wife, they proceeded out of the sanctuary with Paul McCartney’s and Stevie Wonder’s ‘Ebony and Ivory’ playing over the sound system.

I know something of the years of troubles, trials, tribulations and travails my friend had gone through, so it was particularly satisfying and enjoyable to see her in a place of happiness, fulfillment, and joy.

In the first book of the Bible, Genesis, it reads, “The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him”” (Genesis 2:18).

Loneliness sucks. I don’t believe any amount of learning, notoriety, career success, travel, experiences, etc. can compensate for it. I don’t mean to say that those who are single and happy are somehow less happy or fulfilled than married couples; some are content in their single-ness while open to having a mate and others are happy to be single for their entire lives.

I am saying that for the majority of men and women, being together in marriage appears to be the arrangement that offers the best antidote to loneliness.

In a world that can be pretty cruel and heartless, having a spouse who is unconditionally dedicated to you is a distinct advantage in that it is a source of strength, comfort, inspiration, and courage.

My friend’s wedding was a reminder of the inherent goodness of the institution of marriage and of how much I love and appreciate my wife, and I am grateful for it.

Janet and Tony Wedding 9-20-14



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